Living with Loss

My friend died. Its been a few months now, but in the process of grieving, that is not a long time. In my life, I haven't lost a lot of friends, so this path is a bit uneasy for me. Yet, with this loss, as with the others I've experienced, I can't help but first be grateful for the gift of a unique and wonderful life. I miss her laugh, her visits and telephone calls that always began with "hello sweetie." I miss singing at the top of our lungs to old time rock and roll, dressing up at Halloween and driving around at Christmas to look at the lights. This was my friend with whom I shared most of my life, from early childhood to well into my 50s.  My friend with whom I slugged through adolescence, and dared and dreamed a brief bit of our twenties. Ultimately our differences tore us apart and there was a long period of separation of our daily lives. We did not separate ourselves out of hatred or disdain, we simply recognized we had become very different people fr...

As with many things in our lives, there is a requirement for balance. Life is a bit like the human body, fragile, complex, and unpredictable. We know the story when the balance is off…. It’s generally bad, if not initially… it gets there.  The balancing act of life is encompassing and requires synchronizing various parts to produce a fluid and positive outcome. This all makes sense in the world of doing… but not so much in the world of being.  Of being human, filled with emotion, tossed about by life’s ups and downs.  That balancing act requires us to hurt, to push through the wall of emotion, and to either break through to the other side, or succumb and die.  Think about emotions and their counter-point… With confidence, one must also know fear. With intolerance, one must also know empathy; with joy there is the shadow of sorrow. When the balance is off and one emotion takes the hill, we enter the danger zone. Danger is sinister, it smells vulnerabilit...